Patience!

I am NOT a patient person. Typically, I think in terms of "get 'er done". "Let's hit it!" comes out of my mouth at least once a day. This is embarrassing, but I think I am even that way to the flipping dog! It is as if I say, "Hurry it up, Lexie...get that do-do done!" Everything is about efficiency. If I am running, I need to get my butt up the hill and home so I can take a shower and get on to the next thing. If I am at the grocery store; get what we need and move on! I come from a family of impatient people and I am sometimes afraid that I have taken on a trait that, when I see it in other people, I think, "Oh that is kind of sad...they don't even enjoy life cause they are always in such a hurry!" Keep in mind, this is not every day and in every way, but I hate wasting time or being "stuck" somewhere when I think I should be doing something else. That is why, yesterday, it should come as no surprise, I told the towel girl at the rec center, "You are doing what I should be doing" as I checked in and saw her folding. Geeze! Why can't I just relax and enjoy a good workout? Cue the wavy lines and memory music.

24 HOURS PRIOR
OK...I admit it...I left my driver's license at the Budweiser brewery almost a month ago. I didn't realize it until several days later. I looked EVERYWHERE...turned the cars upside down, did all of the laundry, and pilfered every pocket in the house! It dawned on me, that I needed to go on-line and start this ridiculous process (just done in June) over again. I made an appointment for September 12. YES, the "1000 year flood" day. They closed all of the state offices, and once again I was left with the job of weaving through the website to make another appointment. 2:30 on Tuesday of this week. They tell you not to be late, because if they call your name and you are not there, they will move on and you go to the end of the line! I showed at 2:09.
As I approached the check-in, I quickly realized that there was a problem and waited for the "receptionist" to ask what was going on. The only appointment they showed was 9/12. Here I am...early...with no appointment and a one hour wait. Well, I need a license, so I guess I will wait. She told me not to go too far, so I walked down the hallway of an almost-abandoned dirty strip-mall. "Look...a hair place" I thought. I haven't had a hair cut since May and I am currently giving Cristal Gayle a run for her money. She didn't speak English, but I borrowed a couple of magazines and, after making a deal for a trim, returned to the DMV with the promise that I would, "Be right back". It is now 3:00 and, like a game of tag, I run down the mall to return the magazines and tell her I am STILL waiting while living in fear that my number will be called. It is now 3:20. I go to my new BFF, the receptionist and ask about my number. "You're NEXT" when they call an "L". Whew…what a waste of an afternoon but "I've got this" I am thinking. In the meantime, I have read 2 magazines cover to cover, chatted with a lady from Chicago (Yes, I could answer any question about her life!), and even done another life-risking sprint across the hall to a no-name Mexican food place, which is currently in the throes of losing their liquor license, for a diet coke. Liquor? I guess, they probably sold TONS of shooters to people across the hall waiting for their licenses (and obviously they didn't check their age).
I am quickly realizing why people enter post offices with guns. It starts to play on your mind. "You are next" was now 1 hour away: it is 4:20. I am thinking to myself, "Where are the cameras? Am I on a twisted game of Survivor?"...I have made at least 3 new BFFs, but frankly, I am OVER IT and once you are in the twisted game of the DMV you CANNOT LEAVE and risk never having your license. They have now locked the doors, and no one can come in or go out. If you leave, you are done for the day. Like I said...a game-show because now I have consumed 3 weeks worth of diet coke and need to use the restroom! I am now crossing my legs and/or pacing the room. ..When my number L508 is finally called, I receive high 5's from my new friends and the whole place is laughing. I have made it!! I approach the desk and after about 60 seconds (no new info, no eye test necessary), I am sent to the next line for a photo...It is 5:10. I am focused now and anticipating the use of the facilities. They make me remove my scarf (which covers my neck scar). Now I am getting ticked. I just saw them take a photo of a woman fully covered in Muslim dress. I SO wanted to tell them that I wore a scarf for religious reasons, but I held back. This is like the people who get interrogated and finally just break and say, "I did it!!" to get out of the room.
I run for the door. It is 5:30. After finding the bathroom down a dark hall, I am so relieved to be DONE with this day. I can't believe I just spent 3.5 hours at the DMV! WAIT...oh no...The bathroom stall door is stuck! I can't get out. OMG, I am going to die at the DMV!!
I'm sure you are all saying, "I'm going to die if this blog is ANY longer!" I'll get to the point. You got it...I crawled under the door on the dirty floor to get out. I was desperate: I seriously think this was one of the longest days of my life, but I don't even care that I need a shower STAT...I am free...and it is almost DARK, the hair place is closed, the parking lot is nearly empty. Amidst it all, I feel a still small voice saying, "I'm testing you. You passed."