Coffee Talk Mom

A Love Letter to My Boy on Your Wedding

Buzz...As a child, you were a ball of energy and drool...you were a challenge after having our neat and tidy Thomas...The bible says “Train your child up in the way he should go and he will not depart from it”...The “he should go” part was a little hard for us. We tried everything!: ice skating (remember that, Cole?), roller hockey, soccer, flag and tackle football, basketball, track, cup stacking, archery, judo, and debate...but when you swam you always had a smile on your face.
You used to jump into a swimming pool as if you were an Olympic swimmer...but ya...you couldn’t swim yet...you would just look up from the bottom of the pool and reach for my hand...I was always there to raise you to the surface for that breath of air that would re-energize your next jump.

Buzz...you no longer need me to reach down and bring you to the surface...now you can swim...and beautiful Kaylee will be there to pick you up when you need an extra hand. Kaylee, we are so grateful to God for you...We always dreamed that Will would find someone special to walk through life with. the first time I met you, I was trying to mix coleslaw for a crowd...so I did what I thought would be best...I threw it into a garbage bag and asked you and Mare to mix it outside by shaking it...I’m sure you thought, “Dear Lord...what kind of family is this?”... We are glad you’re still “swimming with us “..,
So Buzz...think of it this way , Jesus is your lifeguard and Kaylee your best friend...Dad and I and the rest of the family are sitting on the edge of the pool with our feet in the water sipping margaritas...we are there if you need us and ready to jump in! You will always be our baby boy...but we are grateful you have grown into the man you are today: loyal, strong, capable...we are grateful for each of your groomsmen and friends...we love you both!

I’ll always be your Mom...

CoffeeTalkMom

It’s better to receive than give: Thoughts on having a sane Christmas

It’s the most wonderful time of the year! My mind has been swimming with thoughts about gift-giving, the true meaning of Christmas, balancing the check-book (is that even a thing anymore?), decorating, baking, and running from event to event. Let me start by saying that none of this is bad...but when you hear a little voice in your head saying, “I just need to get to December 26th”, you’re doing too much. Here are some thoughts (in no particular order).

This year has been a dumpster fire of drama at our house and one of the big lessons was this: It is OKAY to receive. The end. I like to GIVE, and receiving is tough... Friends and family want to help...let them. You will be called upon at another time. It’s okay to not be okay.

I have a “gifts are my love language” husband. This will never change. CTDad was raised by an amazing woman who filled the house with decor, hundreds of cookies, and gifts packed under the tree..it is who he is and that is how he experiences love. It’s not a money thing, but, for me, can be a stressor. I have learned to roll with it. I do my best. One of the favorite Christmas’ for me was when we had very little money and gave each other 3 things: a piece of clothing, a book, and a CD. You do YOU and don’t worry about what everyone else is doing.

I am a pretty calm person, but the decorating after Thanksgiving about did me in. Have you ever tried to replace lights on a pre-lit Christmas tree? We put the tree up, took it down, tried to cut off the lights (on the $$$$ tree) and after an hour we realized that some things in life just are not worth the effort. Each light is wrapped 3x around the branch. Jesus take the wheel!! (Or the tree). Goodwill was thrilled to have it, and off we went to find a tree. He literally had to stand guard at the “floor model” tree in Hobby Lobby while I chased the sales guy down for a price. By this time it was 4:00 on Day 1 of decor-gate. The outside light guy called to cancel, and, with that, we went into Day 2. All I can say is that when my CT-Nan and CT-Pop downsized their Christmas decor I was disappointed. I am becoming my Mom and Dad.

I had a baking day. When CTD grabbed a cookie, I almost lost it. I mean, “These are for Christmas...and important people!!”...I caught myself. Take a breath and relax. You are not baking for the President. No one cares that much.

I’m not sure if this blog is making you sane or stressed, so with this I will close. Enjoy the moments. Maybe it is the local high school play, or laughing with your girlfriends at a gift exchange, reading your bible when no one else is awake, making it to the gym and seeing the “GRUMPA” license plate in the parking lot (always makes me laugh), thanking God that you are included and loved and whatever happens, it will be okay!

Peace,

CoffeeTalkMom

“For unto us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”

Isaiah 9:6

What if?

 

With CoffeeTalkDad typically on a world tour with his job, I have grown to TRUST and not ask too many, "What ifs".

"What ifs" are tricky: they can rob you of your joy…then can make you obsess over things that cannot be controlled…they can cause anxiety and depression.

I was recently asked by an 86 year old friend, "If there is God, why does he allow bad things to happen to kids and babies?" This was referring to the recent airline crash which took 2 babies, students on a school trip, and countless others. CTM knows a little about a lot of things, but this eternal question I cannot answer. I just know this: God is good and He doesn't do bad things.

Ironically it is Easter week…my nephew died on Passover…the Tuesday before Easter. I asked myself "What if…" for 10 years. For me, the passing of time has taken that question and turned it into TRUST. I have to trust that God is bigger than any tragedy. That God knows our comings and our goings…that Jesus died for us so that we have the HOPE of seeing these loved ones again in heaven. Don't get me wrong…it's tough…every day…but I have HOPE because of this week.

CTDad always jokes with me about having more life insurance than I do. 2 weeks ago he took a trip to Dusseldorf, Germany. Who has ever even thought about the city of Dusseldorf? I started thinking about it after he began planning his trip about 6 weeks ago, only to be shocked to hear about the plane crash of a flight going into Dusseldorf 5 short days after his return… what if? Ironically, when he goes oversees for work, he usually brings me back some small thing from an airport or the city he visited just for fun. I received the cup in this photo from Starbucks. Now, it is a sign and a symbol for me not to ask what if...but to TRUST. CTMom is recovering from a cold and drinking my morning coffee and thanking God that I can give all of these worries to Him and stop asking what if…

I have a question for you…"What if HE is real? And there is a God in heaven who loves you and died to rescue you from a fallen world?" Just think about it this week…and talk to someone who knows Him.

Happy Easter Week Coffee Talk Peeps!

 

CoffeeTalkMom

The Age Old Question of WHY?

Why do bad things happen to good people? SO many of us are left wondering today, only a couple of weeks before Christmas…how can this happen? How can a young man walk in to a school and shoot little children? Why does God let this happen? If He is all knowing and all powerful like most Christians believe, then why wouldn't he lock those school doors, or send angels to protect those teachers and kids? There are so many questions and so few answers. If you are a parent, hearing the news today I am sure sent a chill down your spine and tears to your eyes. Reminded of Columbine once again, I had to turn off the radio and give my heart a break while driving in the car. There is only so much we can take. There are no answers, but only knowledge that God IS in fact a good God and He loves each of those children and teachers. There is evil in this world and like it or not, the devil is alive and well and in the hearts of man. SO…what can we do? Hug our kids, pray for the families of those who lost children and parents today, pray for survivors…those little children who will never forget hiding in their classroom or huddling with their teachers in a closet. Pray that God will let peace into their hearts and heal that community. God Bless you all and stay safe.

Sadly,

Coffee Talk Mom

Bible Study…uh…no thanks!

I can read your mind already. You are "religious" and believe there is a heaven, but you have never actually read the bible. It is a book on your shelf, pulled out to walk in to church twice a year: You are America. I am too. It was embarrassingly far into my walk with the Lord when I first started going to bible study. Now, this can mean a variety of things including attendance only once a week, to in-depth study to the extent of a college class with daily homework. Admittedly, you get out of a study what you put into it and I did my fare of "foo foo" studies that required very little of me. I have come a long way and through the process have learned so much about why I need a bible study and what amazing gifts it offers.

There is an association, made up of Christians from many different denominations, whose purpose is to bring more people to Christ: the Gideons. You may have heard of them since, if you have ever been in a hotel, chances are there is a bible in your side-table. It is estimated that each bible lasts about 6 years and is read 2300 times. 25% of travelers open and read their bible. I am going to guess that this is a better average than the typical American home which has over 2 bibles on average. If you are not a Christian, maybe you sometimes wonder how friends who call Jesus their Lord never pick up the book that their religion is based upon. There is no good answer. The bible is the basis of everything I believe and if I don't read it, how can I tell others about it? How can I know what I believe and why?

You see, on my own, I am not as diligent as I should be about reading the bible. Frankly, I stink at memorizing scripture and I use that as an excuse…A LOT. What I have learned is that I cannot fall back on that anymore, as I am no longer a "new" Christian. Instead of finding an excuse to leave the bible on the shelf, I must actively seek a study in my community whether it is at my home church or not. Just as Jesus was not a Democrat or Republican, he is not remotely interested in whether you are a Baptist or an Evangelical Christian. He just wants you to KNOW him and have a relationship, not a religion.

If you have never tried one, it can feel daunting. You may be tempted to say, "No thanks" when you hear about the time commitment or reason that you "don't really need it". Trust me when I tell you, something happens when you commit a small amount of time to foraging through the chapters of the bible. God doesn't care if you don't know where the Book of Philemon is. He doesn't care if you have the little helper indexes or if you feel like you "won't know enough". As NIKE says, "Just DO IT" and you will be amazed at what you DON'T know. Years ago I took my first in depth bible study on the Old Testament. It was tough and I felt so dumb about how little I knew. There is so much more to the bible than the Gospels. Dive in under the guidance of a good leader and the bible that has sat on your shelf for years will come alive. I am a big believer in writing in my bible in the margins, underlining, making notations of dates, etc…The sign of a good Christian is, many times, a dinged up bible that looks like it needs a new home at Goodwill but the value that it hold to the person who owns it is priceless. My Mom has a well used bible. My sister's is tear stained and still going strong. Mine is now stuffed with special photos, funeral cards, and even Pop Rocks, given to me by my friend Joanna. Every time I see those, I pray for her and her family who suffered a GREAT loss when their son died at 15 from a very rare form of cancer.

Set a small goal…open it…then read it…even for a few minutes every day. Before you know it, you will want to know more and more and build on your faith. Maybe your "No thanks" will become a "YES please"!

Carry On,

CoffeeTalkMom

P.S. If you are an IPAD person, I highly recommend the "Glo Bible" application. (www.globible.com) This application is full of videos, is easy to read, you can take notes, and it provides AWESOME information if you just can't "imagine what it was like to walk in Jesus' shoes". Dave was a huge supporter when they were just a "start- up" and now they have reached a million people with their app.

Where were you?? What now?

Does it amaze anyone else reading here today that it is the ELEVENTH Anniversary of 9-11? It seems like just yesterday I was making a lunch for Thomas as he was going off to 6^th grade outdoor camp and clicked on the kitchen TV. It was surreal at the time…almost like what I was watching was something made up for TV ratings, or a what-if scenario. As the tragedy unfolded on live TV, we had to make a decision as parents. Were we forced, under huge pressure, to decide if we would send our child into the mountains of Colorado to enjoy Outdoor Ed or keep him where we knew he was close and (in our mind) safe.

The BEST decision we ever made was to send him to camp. The school district was excellent and off he went completely AWAY from any televisions or radios for the next 5 days. Our oldest is very connected to life and the world around him. Little did we know, God was providing us (and especially him ) a hedge of protection. YES, he eventually saw most of the coverage, but it wasn't live and it didn't seem as physically close when we could sit with him and explain…although when it came right down to it, we had NO explanation…that took awhile. How does any religion HATE so much that they want to physically harm thousands of innocent people. I have come to realize that radical Islam is just that…RADICAL! There is evil in the world, and there always will be.

I think it is important, especially as we age (yes, I am talking from experience) to educate our children and to keep the memory of that day alive. It was and IS a historical event that we as a country should NEVER forget. I must say, I didn't hear anything about terror in the speeches from the past couple of weeks. Let's face it, when we are 16 trillion in debt as a country, the priorities change. Like it or not, it is not front and center during this season of political junk. Maybe the weight is on us now. We must teach our children about religion (good, bad, and otherwise)…we must teach them history…and about being diligent with their safety. How many of us thought we would ever have to remove our shoes to go through security at an airport? If you think back, one of the big issues at that time was national security and how these pilots were able to train at American flight schools and go unnoticed. Isn't it amazing that we can vote in many places without an ID?, drive? but we can't go past the front desk at DIA without it? Where do we, as Americans, stand on the issues of border patrol? Is it being unkind to others (or in my case non-Christian) to say, "Wait a minute! You need to earn your right to be a citizen of the USA"…What would I need to do to become a citizen of Mexico for instance?? I would be shot dead for crossing a fence into that country. We are Land of the Free and Home of the Brave after-all…we gotta' let everyone in! (who is paying the bill is another blog)…

My question to you is what did you learn from 9/11 and how did our country change for the better? Did we change enough? Did we forget who and what really happened that day? I can guarantee that the families affected have not forgotten the pain they experienced that day. Let's encourage each other today … to speak to our kids at dinner tonight, to vote on November 6^th, and most of all to pray and thank God for this amazing country we live in! What now?

Coffee Talk Mom